I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
I think people are normalizing furries
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
Randomize