i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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