People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
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