Sry I called you an 8
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
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