Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Randomize
