I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize
