put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
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