Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
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I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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