need another drink. this is the easiest way
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
Randomize
