a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
I have peed in a lot of sinks
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Randomize