Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
