She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
Randomize
