i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
Randomize
