another moral hangover. fuck.
I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Randomize