So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
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