i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
handjob tips. give me some.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
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