Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
Randomize
