so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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