My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
Randomize
