Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize