Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
Randomize
