i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
Randomize
