The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
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