windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
Randomize
