The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
