I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Randomize
