I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point π
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience π€·π»ββοΈ
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize