Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
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