Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
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