names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
Randomize
