How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
Randomize
