Joe is yelling at the trees again.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Randomize
