next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
Randomize
