So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
