Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
Randomize
