At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Randomize
