Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
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