What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
Vodka?
Forever.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
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