Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(508): View more from Massachusetts

For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.

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(404): View more from Georgia

Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.

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(566): View more from

According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !

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(336): View more from North Carolina

I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight

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23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce
Read it at the TFLN blog
(440): View more from Ohio

My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.

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(816): View more from Missouri

And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin

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(203): View more from Connecticut

If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"

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(248): View more from Michigan

I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life

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(440): View more from Ohio

Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny

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