Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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