a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
Randomize
