well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
Randomize
