I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
This toilet bowl is my home.
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