I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
Randomize
