where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Randomize
