so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
whose ass print is on the piano?
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Sorry dude, one minute I was flirting with a bachelorette party from Dallas and the next I’m being tied to the bed by the bride
Trying to wrangle us an invite to the wedding
Randomize