Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
Randomize
