i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Randomize
