fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
I did not marry a roomba.
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