Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
Randomize
