Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
